The Messy Middle: Where the Magick of Transformation Happens
Have you ever set off on an adventure, sure of where you were headed—only to have everything shift in ways you never saw coming?
I get it.
The Magick You Can’t Plan For
I stood enchanted on the ruins of PhuyupatamarcaI –ancient ruins along the Inca Trail in Peru.
It was late, and the sky was impossibly clear. The kind of clear you only get when you’re high in the mountains—8,900 feet high, to be exact—and miles away from the nearest village.
The moon hung low over the ruins, washing the ancient stones in silver light. Mist curled over the terraces, rising from the valley below like veils of time, sliding between the stones, caressing the landscape with ethereal fingers.
Above me, the stars were so bright—so thick—that it felt like I could reach up and drink them in.
I stood there, surrounded by the echoes of a civilization long gone, feeling small in the best possible way.
The air was alive with a stillness so deep it hummed in my bones.
Even the voices of my fellow trekkers faded away to nothing, like magick.
Standing there, wrapped in that stillness, I felt like I’d stepped out of time, like I was part of something vast and unseen.
Or in a scene from The Lord of the Rings.
It felt sacred.
My whole body hummed. I felt connected to the stars!
It was the third night of my five-day trek along the Inca Trail to Machu Picchu, the bucket-list wonder beloved by people around the world. I could hardly wait to stand amidst the ruins of Machu Picchu itself.
I expected to feel even more of a sacred connection there, to sense the souls of all the pilgrims who had sought the wisdom of the ancients since the Incas fashioned the citadel in the 15th Century.
When Expectations Meet Reality
Instead? Machu Picchu was beautiful.
But in comparison, it felt like a tourist destination. Even though we were allowed in before the throngs of people arrived by train, there were already hundreds of visitors milling about, cameras clicking, voices echoing against the stones.
I kept waiting for that same feeling to hit me—that deep, wordless connection.
But it never did.
And while standing on its terraces makes for great bragging rights, when I look back on that trek, it isn’t Machu Picchu that sends a thrill through my bones.
It’s Phuyupatamarca that I remember with wonder.
That night, wrapped in silver light and silence, stays with me.
When the Journey Surprises You
Isn’t it funny how we set our sights on something—convinced that’s the thing we want—only to get there and realize it was never about the destination at all?
👉 Maybe that’s where you are right now. You thought you knew what your life was supposed to look like—who you were supposed to be—but everything has shifted. Now, the path ahead feels uncertain, like you’re wandering through the mist, waiting for clarity that never quite arrives.
👉 Maybe you feel paralyzed, exhausted, unsure of what step to take next. Or maybe you’ve spent so long trying to be who others expect you to be that you don’t even know what you want anymore.
👉 And I know—it’s tempting to want the answers now. To just skip ahead to the part where it all makes sense.
👉 But what if the magick is already unfolding? Right here. In this in-between space. Even if you can’t see it yet.
We think it’s about reaching the summit, crossing the finish line, arriving at the dream job, the perfect relationship, the life-changing moment.
But more often, it’s about something else entirely.
A feeling we didn’t expect.
A moment we couldn’t have planned.
A serendipitous turn that leads us somewhere even better.
And we only see it looking back—the way the journey itself was quietly reshaping us, showing us what we really wanted all along.
When You’re in the Messy Middle
For the women I work with, this desire for clarity often comes in the messy middle. When everything feels uncertain. When the life they thought they wanted has crumbled, or when they’re stuck in a fog of doubt, exhaustion, and self-questioning.
It’s easy to think, If I could just get there—if I could just feel confident again, if I could just know for sure what’s next—then I’d be okay.
But what if the magick is unfolding right now?
In the moments you can’t yet see as turning points? In the unexpected whispers of intuition, the tiny sparks of curiosity, the glimpses of wonder that catch you off guard?
What’s Been Your Phuyupatamarca Moment?
What’s been your Phuyupatamarca moment?
The time when the real magick wasn’t in the THING you thought you wanted, but in the moments of wonder and synchronicity along the way?
Tell me in the comments—I’d love to hear your story.
Ready to Invite More Magick into Your Journey?
Try this:
Step outside, place your hand on your heart, and ask: What unexpected magick is unfolding for me right now?
Stay open for a sign. 🌿
👉 Reminder: You don’t need all the answers. Just take the next step. Breathe. Trust that the path is unfolding—even in the uncertainty.
And if you need a little extra support along the way, I’m here for you.
Have you ever felt like life pulled the rug out from under you, leaving you unsure of who you are or where to go next? Perhaps you’ve experienced heartbreak, faced a health crisis, navigated a major life transition, or found yourself questioning your identity after years of following the “rules.” If this resonates, you’re not alone—and transformation coaching might be exactly what you need.
What Is Transformation Coaching?
Transformation coaching is a holistic approach to personal growth that supports you during times of deep change. It’s not just about setting goals or creating action plans (though we’ll do that too). It’s about helping you reconnect with your true self, heal emotional wounds, and create a life aligned with your values and desires.
Unlike therapy, which often focuses on past trauma, or traditional life coaching, which emphasizes external achievements, transformation coaching addresses the emotional and energetic shifts needed to navigate identity-shaking transitions. It’s about empowering you to step into the most authentic version of yourself.
Common Challenges Women Face
Life’s challenges have a way of leaving us feeling stuck, lost, or unsure of who we are. Women often come to transformation coaching because they’re experiencing:
Shame or self-doubt after a major life event like infidelity, divorce, or a health diagnosis.
Loss of identity after becoming a mother, ending a long-term relationship, or experiencing a career change.
Emotional overwhelm from juggling the demands of single motherhood, caregiving, or personal healing.
A longing for more meaning, purpose, and fulfillment but not knowing where to start.
How I Help You Rediscover Your Magick
As a Transformation Coach, I specialize in guiding women through these identity-shaking changes to help them ditch shame, reclaim their unique magick, and cultivate deep self-love. My approach blends decades of leadership experience with powerful tools like:
Neuroscience-backed techniques: Rewire limiting beliefs and create lasting, positive change.
Shamanic healing practices: Release emotional blocks, tap into your intuition, and find inner peace.
Expressive arts and journaling: Explore your emotions and rediscover your creativity as a path to healing.
Nature rituals: Reconnect with the natural world to ground yourself and find clarity.
This work isn’t about “fixing” you. It’s about helping you remember your inherent worth and guiding you back to a place of self-love and steadfast confidence.
Real Stories of Transformation
One client, a single mother navigating several big changes in her life, came to me because she was stressed and overwhelmed with all the choices facing her. Through our work together, she learned to set healthy boundaries, make positive choices for herself and her son, and build a life that felt meaningful and joyful. Today, she’s got her own business, and feels more empowered than ever before.
Another client, recovering from infidelity, worked with me to heal her heartbreak and rebuild her confidence. By the end of our time together, she had not only found peace but had also uncovered a deeper sense of self-worth and resilience.
Is Transformation Coaching Right for You?
If you’re:
Tired of feeling stuck or overwhelmed,
Ready to heal from shame and self-doubt,
Longing to rediscover your purpose and passions, or
Craving a life that feels deeply aligned with your true self…
Then transformation coaching could be the catalyst you need. You don’t have to navigate this journey alone.
Take the First Step
Are you ready to ditch the shame, reclaim your power, and love yourself clear down to your bones?
Let’s talk. I invite you to schedule a free discovery call to explore how transformation coaching can support you on your journey.
Reflections on a Challenging Year: Finding Meaning Beyond the Struggle
I scoffed at the student motivational speaker at my nephew’s graduation.
Her speech was uplifting—full of big dreams and bold declarations about how she and her classmates were going to change the world. Normally, speeches like this get me teary-eyed, filling me with HOPE that the next generation might actually save us.
The weight of grief clouded any sense of hope, and I couldn’t see past the pain to recognize the potential for growth.
“Yeah right,” I muttered internally. “Just wait thirty years. Half of you will be in active addiction, and the other half will be sucked right into the greedy capitalist dream.”
Navigating grief is a challenging journey. In the midst of our loss, my partner and I struggled, neither of us able to face clients, let alone ‘market’ our businesses.
These weren’t our best moments. Justin spent his days deep in online political debates, while I spent the first half of the year binge-watching Marvel shows. I wanted to BE Jessica Jones—her brand of sarcasm and self-deprecation hit me right in the feels.
The Turning Point
A few weeks later, still horrified at my jaded thoughts during that graduation, I decided my depression had gone on long enough. So I did what I always do when I feel stuck—I researched my way out.
I found an online course that promised inspiration, and one of the first activities was to reflect and harvest my year.
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t need to do this. I already know—my year SUCKED.”
Still, I answered the first question: “Did you have a vision for the year?”
YES! I had big plans to grow my business, but then Josh WAS KILLED IN A F-ING CRAB ACCIDENT WHILE HELPING SOME ARROGANT CAPTAIN WHO THOUGHT HE WAS BETTER THAN EVERYONE ELSE.
I moved to the next question: “What occurred, evolved, or happened since you set this intention? How would you describe your results?”
The anger bubbled up again. SAME ANSWER. “DITTO,” I scrawled, jabbing my pen hard enough to rip the page.
But then came another set of questions: “What were the highlights of your year? What are you most proud of? What had the most positive impact on you and/or others?”
At first, this stumped me. The bitterness and disappointment I’d been clinging to blocked access to any positive memories. But then I remembered something small yet meaningful—
In the spring, I got to drive my niece to her club volleyball practice two hours away every week. Since she’s a teen, those alone moments are rare. But every single time, she’d say, “This was fun, Auntie Kristin. We should hang out more often.”
That memory softened something inside me. I moved on to the rest of the questions, slowly re-evaluating my year—not through the capitalistic lens of productivity and success, but from a human perspective.
Redefining Growth & Success
Looking back, this shift—choosing to move through my jaded year and see what else was there—became a pivotal moment of growth for me.
One of the reasons I was so jaded was because I was filled with self-loathing. I couldn’t “fix” Josh’s wife’s grief, or Justin’s, or even my own. But leaning into my pain and feelings of failure ultimately made me a better practitioner.
It forced me to learn that it’s not my job to fix.
It’s my job to hold sacred space.
To BE there.
To allow what is.
“Some periods of our growth are so confusing that we don’t even recognize that growth is happening. We may feel hostile or angry or weepy and hysterical, or we may feel depressed. … However, we are, in fact, in the process of change…”
Those long periods—when something inside us seems to be clawing its way out of our skin… when we’re frozen with uncertainty about our next step… when we feel completely untethered… when we’re angry at the world because deep down, we’re grieving something big—
Personal growth is challenging enough without the added weight of grief and loss. And when we measure success the way the world expects us to—by external achievements, productivity, and met goals—it can leave us feeling like we’ve failed.
But what if there was another way?
I created a guide called Measure Your Year—a reflection tool designed to help you assess your growth through a lens of self-compassion and personal transformation, rather than capitalist productivity.
If you’re looking for a new way to measure your year—one that honors your inner journey as much as your external accomplishments—download Measure Your Year Guide + Bonus Meditation and start your reflection today.
Because even the hardest years have lessons worth harvesting. And you deserve to recognize just how far you’ve come.
Overcoming Grief and Finding Purpose: Turning Tragedy into Action
I bet we all remember where we were when the planes hit the Twin Towers. That moment when the world seemed to freeze. I also remember when the shooting at Columbine High School happened in 1999—a tragedy that shattered so many lives. But what about the others? The school shootings, the tragedies that have come after? Can you name them? Can you remember what you were doing when you first heard about them?
When the Sandy Hook shooting took place on December 14th, 2012, I was at the airport in Florida, about to fly back to Bolivia with my 12-year-old nephew and 9-year-old niece. They’d been visiting my family over Thanksgiving, and I was their “guardian” on the way home for Christmas. I watched the news at the airport, my stomach dropping as the horror of it all sunk in. My body froze—mouth open, throat tight, eyes welling up—but I quickly turned my attention to the kids, determined to protect them from the devastation unfolding on the screens around us.
It was all I could do in that moment—protect the children.
But since that day, there have been so many shootings at schools, malls, synagogues, churches, and beyond. Too many to count. Too many to remember what I was doing when I heard. Can you recall them? Is your memory as scattered as mine?
That’s a huge problem.
A Growing List of Losses
Here’s a List of JUST the Schools:
A list of school shootings
From Sandy Hook to the countless others, the list of school shootings alone is staggering. We should be outraged, right? But instead, many of us slip into hopelessness, and worse—apathy. It’s easy to feel like there’s nothing we can do, that the problem is too big.
But don’t let yourself stay stuck there.
Clarissa Pinkola Estés, in her profound wisdom, reminds us:
“In any dark time, there is a tendency to veer toward fainting over how much is wrong or unmended in the world. Do not focus on that. […] Ours is not the task of fixing the entire world all at once, but of stretching out to mend the part of the world that is within our reach.”
Overcoming grief and finding purpose isn’t about solving every problem in the world all at once. It’s about reaching for the part we can heal, the action we can take. And in the face of heartbreak and tragedy, action is what wakes us up.
What can you do?
Suggested Actions:
If you feel heartbroken, overwhelmed, or stuck in grief, remember that action is the antidote. Here are a few ways to start mending the world within your reach:
Call Your Representatives Demand that they act on gun reform laws. It’s easy to feel helpless, but calling your local senators and representatives is a small yet powerful action. Here’s how you can contact them:
Support Organizations that Are Making a Difference Glennon Doyle’s Together Rising is one of the many organizations that turn heartbreak into action. They are raising funds to provide immediate support for families and to push for long-term solutions. Check out what they’re doing and consider donating or getting involved.
Take Care of Yourself In times of grief, we often forget the importance of self-care. Taking care of yourself is not selfish—it’s necessary. It’s how we stay grounded and able to act.
Healing Through Action
Feeling triggered or stuck? That’s normal. After trauma, many of us carry wounds that may not always be visible but are deeply felt. Did you know that 70% of the world’s population experiences psychological trauma at some point? And over 60% of adults in the U.S. have experienced an adverse childhood experience (ACE)? It’s no wonder that overcoming grief and finding purpose feels impossible at times.
But here’s the truth: you don’t have to navigate this alone.
It’s Time to Act
The key to overcoming grief and finding purpose is action. Even small steps make a difference, and the world needs your light. Don’t let the weight of despair freeze you.
Prayers for the Brokenhearted
And finally, if you are heart broken, here are two prayers from Mirabai Starr’s wonderful book of prayers: Mother of God Similar to Fire.
I find this prayer to be comforting:
from MiraBai Starr’s book of prayers: Mother of God Similar to Fire
Are You a News Watcher? You Might Be Damaging Your Health
If you regularly watch the news, it’s time to reconsider the impact it’s having on your emotional and mental health. We’re all tempted to tune in when major events are unfolding, but the truth is, consuming constant news can harm our well-being. Numerous studies, like this one, have shown how it can negatively affect our mental state.
Now, I’m not suggesting you bury your head in the sand like an ostrich, ignoring everything around you. (Although this isn’t a bad choice as long as its a temporary measure!)
Do you like to put your head in the sand when life gets to feel like too much?
What can you do instead?
You can stay informed and make a difference without compromising your emotional health. Let’s talk about how you can create a mindful, emotional diet for mental health that doesn’t leave you feeling drained or overwhelmed. Here are four tips to help you navigate the chaos:
1) Limit Your News Consumption:
Skim through headlines once a day—preferably in a newspaper or online. If you’re a news junkie, try limiting it to twice a day. Avoid checking the news obsessively, especially when it’s overwhelming.
2) Choose One Story and Take Action:
Pick a story that resonates deeply with you. Spend a few moments researching simple actions you can take to help. Feeling like you can make a difference will boost your sense of agency and calm your emotions.
3) Use the Inner Sanctuary Tool:
Before and after engaging with the news, practice the Inner Sanctuary Tool. This will help you calm your nervous system and center your heart. Ask your Wise Self (or pray if that’s your thing) for guidance on one concrete action you can take to either have impact or find peace in the midst of chaos.
4) Build a Playlist of Joy:
Create a playlist of songs that lift your spirits. It’s okay if they’re sad songs that bring you comfort—sometimes music can be the healing balm our souls need.
Think of Your Emotions as Your “Emotional Diet”
I want you to start thinking about your emotions as your “emotional diet.”
“What is an emotional diet?” you might ask. Good question. Just as we consider the impact of what we eat on our physical health, we need to consider how our emotional intake affects our overall well-being. What you choose to “consume” emotionally has as much (if not more) influence on your health as what you eat. Here’s just one study that confirms it.
Though the term “emotional diet” isn’t quite mainstream, we’re moving in the right direction. The conversation around mental health is gaining momentum, with leaders like Simone Biles and Brené Brown opening the door to healthier emotional practices. Global conversations on well-being and the focus on mental health are growing stronger, with more people recognizing the importance of emotional balance in daily life.
What’s YOUR Emotional Diet?
In today’s world, it’s more important than ever to be mindful of what we’re feeding ourselves emotionally. The constant barrage of news, political shifts, and social media pressure can leave us feeling angry, sad, anxious, or burned out. These emotional states leave us in an incoherent state, meaning our bodies and minds aren’t functioning at their best.
Common signs of incoherence include difficulty concentrating, racing thoughts, heart palpitations, or fidgeting. Sound familiar?
The good news is that you can choose your emotional response. When you start thinking of your emotions as part of your emotional diet for mental health, you can make choices that support a healthier mindset and help you feel more balanced.
A Simple Action: Choose What You Consume
If you know watching the news triggers your nervous system, you have permission to simply walk away. Whether it’s leaving the room when your partner is tuned into the latest crisis or muting a news alert, you get to decide what you consume emotionally.
[My own partner is a news junkie, so I’ve become quite skilled at stepping away when the stories start to wear on my peace.]
Ready to Create Your Own Soul Care Routine?
If you’re ready to take charge of your emotional diet and start cultivating a healthier, more balanced state of being, I’ve got something for you.
Download my Soul Care Checklist to get started on building a routine that nourishes your mind, body, and soul. It’s packed with practical tips and tools that will help you thrive—no matter what the world throws your way.
Take action today and start prioritizing your well-being. You deserve it!
I used to be certain I wasn’t a perfectionist. But a deep dive into my own shadows over the past couple of years revealed some surprising truths.
Here’s why I didn’t think I had perfectionist tendencies:
I can be a chronic procrastinator.
I often hit “post” or deliver assignments before triple-checking every word.
I shy away from competing with other women, especially outside of sports.
I love trying new activities without worrying about failing.
I’m definitely not a Type-A, hyper-achiever.
So, with all these “non-perfectionist” behaviors, how could I be one?
But when I really dug into the reasons behind these behaviors, I found they were driven by perfectionism in ways I hadn’t even realized.
Why Perfectionism Drove My Procrastination and Avoidance
Procrastination? It wasn’t about being lazy; I was just trying to avoid putting something out there that wasn’t “good enough.” By waiting until the last minute, I gave myself an excuse for any imperfections.
Avoiding Competition? It wasn’t about being scared of other women; I was afraid of losing—and the story I would tell myself about it if I did.
Taking on Challenges? The bigger, the better! I set unrealistic goals so I could “fail” without anyone expecting success—and that gave me the perfect out.
But that’s not freedom. That’s perfectionism dressed as procrastination, avoidance, and self-sabotage.
The Myth of Perfection
Perfectionism often wears many faces.
It sounds like:
“I must perform flawlessly in all areas of my life while making it look easy.”
Or, “I must make sure I have a really good excuse for not performing at a high level.”
It looks like:
A tendency to demand perfection from ourselves (and others) instead of embracing mistakes and imperfection.
Or, the self-sabotage of avoiding competition or massive goals so there’s no pressure for perfection.
Its main strategy for approval?
To be the best at everything. Or to avoid trying, just to protect yourself from failure.
But either way, perfectionism robs you of your creative confidence, vulnerability, and authenticity—and leaves your nervous system in a state of imbalance.
Does any of this resonate with you? When you evaluate your own behaviors, look at the WHY behind them. Are you protecting yourself from failure? Or are you trying to prove something?
Is There a Healthy Level of Perfectionism?
You might be thinking, “Kristin, surely there’s a healthy level of perfectionism. How else do you explain all those Type-A people who are so successful?”
Well, here’s the truth: there is no such thing as “perfect” when it comes to human beings. Perfectionism will only leave you stuck in feelings of failure, no matter how much you achieve.
And those so-called “successful” perfectionists? Underneath all the achievements, they tend to stress more, feel more anxiety, and struggle to bounce back from setbacks. Success without perfectionism is far more liberating.
How to Balance Your Perfectionist Tendencies
It’s healthy to strive for your best, but it’s important to shift your mindset away from perfection.
Instead of striving for flawlessness, set high—but achievable—standards. This will give you a sense of satisfaction and increase your self-esteem without pushing you to the brink of burnout.
Awareness is the first step to breaking the habit of perfectionism. Then, look at your thought distortions—those habitual patterns of thinking that tend to be inaccurate or overly critical. Common distortions for perfectionists include:
Discounting the positive (e.g., focusing on a mistake and ignoring the positive feedback you received).
Black-and-white thinking (e.g., thinking eating one cookie ruins your entire diet).
“Must-erbation” (living by unrealistic, impossible demands).
Combatting Perfectionism: A Simple Action
Choose one of these distortions that applies to you, and keep a log for a week. When you catch the thought, thank it for its wisdom, but then choose to shift the narrative. For example, if someone compliments your speech, acknowledge the flaw, but also accept the compliment. Your speech may not have been flawless, but you received positive feedback for a reason.
Embrace Progress, Not Perfection
If you’re ready to embrace change and ditch the perfectionism that’s holding you back, I’ve got something for you: my Soul Care Checklist. This free resource is packed with actionable steps that will help you get unstuck, reconnect with yourself, and practice simple rituals that nourish your soul.
You deserve to be fully YOU—without all the perfectionism weighing you down.
I know you’re probably tired of hearing about stress—believe me, I get it. But here’s the thing: whether you’re sick of it or in full-on denial about its impact, stress doesn’t care. It will continue to wreak havoc on your body and mind unless you take real action.
Even if you have great tools for stress management—maybe yoga, trail running, or meditation/prayer each morning—that’s awesome! But here’s the catch: Unless you can interrupt your body’s response to stress in the moment, right when it’s happening, your system is going to keep reacting the same way it always has.
The tools I teach aren’t just for long-term stress management—they help you stop stress in its tracks, as it’s happening. That way, you can choose a different response before your body decides to do something reactive or careless.
Stress becomes a bigger issue when you get used to it.
Over the past few years, have you gotten so used to daily stress—pressures, irritations, annoyances—that it just feels normal? Here’s the kicker: This is exactly when stress is at its most dangerous. When you think you’re handling it but you’ve actually become numb to it, that’s when it messes with your clarity, decision-making, and health.
Think about your response to the most recent headlines—maybe shootings or other tragedies. Did you just flinch and mutter, “The world is a mess,” and move on?
That’s a sign you’re numb to stress. And it’s costing you more than you realize.
When stress runs unchecked, your body pays the price.
Here’s how it works: your stress response system is meant to be self-limiting. Once a threat passes, your hormone levels should return to normal. But when stress is constant, that fight-or-flight reaction stays on. And that long-term activation of stress hormones, like cortisol, disrupts your body’s systems.
This constant churn can lead to:
Anxiety & depression
Digestive problems & headaches
Muscle pain & tension
Heart disease, high blood pressure, and stroke
Sleep issues, weight gain, and memory problems
It’s time to interrupt that cycle. This is why coping with stress as it happens is so important. It’s not just about surviving—it’s about thriving in the face of life’s demands.
The body’s stress response is designed to protect you, but if you’re not actively interrupting it, it can quickly start to work against you, leaving you drained, overwhelmed, and disconnected from your true self.
That’s why managing stress in the moment is so crucial. The tools I teach help you do just that—interrupt the stress response as it happens, so you can choose a different, healthier reaction before it spirals into something bigger.
But here’s the thing: sometimes, no matter how many yoga sessions or long runs you get in, you need something more when life feels like it’s hitting you from all sides.
That’s where true soul care comes in.
When life knocks you sideways and a bubble bath just won’t cut it, you need a deeper kind of self-care.
That’s why I created my Soul-Care Checklist.
It’s designed to help you:
🪄 Steady yourself even when the world feels like it’s crumbling. 🪄 Reconnect with your inner calm and reclaim your strength. 🪄 Find clarity for what’s next, even when you’re feeling lost or overwhelmed.
If you’re ready to give yourself the deep care you need, grab your Soul Care Checklist today.
The Birth of Practical-Magick: A Journey from Chaos to Clarity
I’m going to come straight out and say it: my life has been intense over the past several years. But then, transformation often is.
Between December 2016 and January 2019, my partner and I lost six loved ones. In the midst of that, we were forced to change homes and chose to move into his family’s ancestral Finnish-style log home. It’s lovely—but also old and in constant need of care and repair.
We’re both self-employed, and when you’re navigating profound loss and upheaval, it’s hard to find the energy to bring in clients. Financial stress followed. And this was all BEFORE 2020 turned the world upside down.
Transforming Comparison Judgment
Like so many women, I often fall into “comparison worthiness,” telling myself I shouldn’t complain because others have it worse. And sure, that’s true. But as a wise friend once posted:
“We can be grateful for what we have AND feel depressed. We can hold compassion for someone in a darker space AND feel anguish in our own space. We can recognize our luck AND cry for five hours at our misfortune. We can feel all the feelings AND be a better human for it.”
—Becca
But instead of offering myself that grace, I tortured myself with “comparison judgment.” I watched other practitioners “making it” by following the latest guru-approved marketing trend—“Fill Your Retreats,” “Pack the Room,” “Sell Your Beta Course.” I tried them all (well, most). And none of them worked for me. My business barely grew, leaving me feeling like a failure at entrepreneurship.
And it wasn’t just my business. I wasn’t following through on promises to myself. I let go of daily creative practices. I spent less time in the lake, with family, reading, moving my body. It all started slipping away.
The Gift of an Injured Shoulder
Then came the unexpected gift—an injured shoulder, pandemic unemployment, and a financial cushion that gave me permission to pause. To heal. Physically, yes. But also emotionally. Spiritually.
Who knew that a car accident leading to surgery and a long recovery would be the catharsis I needed?
ca·thar·sis /kəˈTHärsəs/ noun “the process of releasing, and thereby providing relief from, strong or repressed emotions.”
I didn’t. Not at first. I was frustrated. I wasn’t healing as fast as expected. I had to take more time off work than I “should.” My business languished.
And yet… I continued physical therapy. Somatic therapy. Created beautiful spaces in my garden. Swam. Laughed. Cried. Restored my family’s rental cabin. Spent time with my partner. My friends. Myself.
And I hired a marketing coach who let me move at my own, slow pace.
Rooting In and Growing
My goal became simple: root into my business. Really understand what I do. So, I wrote about it. Every single morning. Journaling through frustration, through repetition, through slow, unfolding clarity.
Who is my client? What do I DO? What is my thought leadership? My philosophy? What makes me different? Unique?
What I came to realize was that over those long, stressful years, I had grown.
I’m no longer afraid of the shadows. I can stand with my clients in their darkest moments without feeling the need to rush them back into the light. I can hold duality better. I no longer feel like I have to be perfect, or that my whole life needs to look like an Instagram highlight reel.
I realized that my greatest gift is… me.
My history. My eclectic experiences. My energy. My humor. My way of weaving science and story, physiology and myth, structured tools and sacred mystery. Anyone can teach these things, but no one else can do it quite like I do.
Learning from the Trees
Over time, as the seasons turned and the leaves fell, my business evolved too:
What I DO is hold sacred space for women to fully live their messy, beautifully sacred lives. To be imperfect AND radiant at the same time. To slow down. To ponder. To love. To root into themselves. To make room for mystery. To stop rushing toward an endless finish line.
I offer them a sanctuary where they can be seen, heard, and loved—exactly as they are.
The Birth of Practical-Magick
And who I AM is an Intuitive Soul Guide. A Sacred Depths Practitioner. A Transformational Coach.
I study human physiology, the neurobiology of emotions, the psychobiology of women. But I also immerse myself in myths, archetypes, and mystery. Mother Earth is my second mother. Creative practices—art, writing, movement—are my medicine.
THIS. This is what I do. And what makes it Magick… is me.
I’ve always called what I do “Practical-Magick.”
And so, this new/old business is birthed in darkness, ready to walk with others through both shadow and light.
